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| DEVIL
MAY NOT CARE by Billy Bennett 
Fly if your pigtail catches fire Dive down the nearest sink Remember if you wash a pancake It's underwear's sure to shrink. Once I was a twister, just like you Had ricketts, false teeth and no hair Do you remember when first we met You do? You're a liar, Devil-May-Care. Devil-May-Care who trampled corn To cover his awful past Devil-May-Care, the cowheel taster And a batchelor's son to the last. Some of you tell how you beat the bull Aye, brag on a flush of hair When you've scattered the giblets in the tube With dirty old Devil-May-Care. You were lucky at finding things not lost As a milkmaid milks with pliers Your mothers nurse your baby If you can't use Dunlop tyres. Dog at the lamp-post wags its tail 'Cos the dirty legs are square What little remains of the crystal set Of dirty old Devil-May-Care. How do I live? On the Parish Where do I sleep? In a tomb I was born in a sardine's graveyard Where treacle and sausages bloom. Asleep on your back in a haunted house And dreaming of rats with bobbed hair Fighting boss-eyed bulls and knock-kneed cows Puts the wind up Devil-May-Care. But we can find you a three-quid short The Lady lodger's out It makes you think what the Parson knows When the feathers are lying about. We got drunk together the night we met At a Japanese Yiddish wake And I slipped my hand deep down in her purse And I pinched her current cake. Everyone said that her legs were false And I proved it so in the dark But we tried to dance the can-can in Paris But her magneto wouldn't spark. So I reeled up the aisle with me braces broke While crowds pelted me with bad eggs When the Parson said, "Look what the wind's blown in." She hit him with one of her legs. What does it matter if rock cakes rock And pineapples fly in the air 'Cos at death I shall cheerfully cry, "I'm sticking." But he'll say 'Pontoons only, Devil-May Care.'
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