I'M NINETY-FOUR THIS MORNIN'
by
Will Fyffe (1921)
It's nice to sit down when you're nintey-four, Down by the
kitchen fire,
And think o' the times you used to have, And the girls that
you admire.
But a farmer's life's a healthy life, I feel as good as new,
And I'll bet a bob you'll be surpris'd at what I'll tell to
you.
CHORUS:
I'm ninety-four this mornin', Aye, I'm ninety-four today.
I'm not so young as I used to be, I'm gettin' old and grey.
But my heart is young, and I'm fond of fun, And I'm very proud
to say
That I'm gettin' married on Thursday Tho' I'm ninety-four
today.
Of course down in the village It will be a big surprise,
The people think it's all a joke, That the minister's telling
lies.
Oh! But we will get the laugh at them, As sure as I'm alive,
For there'll maybe be a christ'ning yet Before I'm ninety-five.
PATTER:
Aye, ninety-four this mornin' at twenty-six minutes past
four. Aye, and I'm feeling as well and as fit as ever
I was in all my days. And I'm gettin' married again. You
know there's a
lot of people surprised at me gettin' married
again, and goin' in for this "Blue Lagoon"business at
my time of life. But I don't see anything to laugh at.
A farmer's life's a very
healthy life, you know. I consider
that a man that's lived on a farm all his life, he's as
good a man at ninety as a man that's lived in the city
at forty. There's not much
temptation in a wee sleepy
village like this, you know. And mind ye, I'm expecting
a lotof presents, cos I'm well connected; aye,and well
respected too. I'm a town-councillor
in this place here,
and altho' I say it mysel', this is a very progressive
place, very
progressive. We're thinking of doing away
with candles, and using paraffin oil before
long. There's
only one thing that's troubling me about gettin' married
again- it's the
bairns. Oh, I've been married before,
you know! I've been married before, and I've gotthree
boys. Aye, and fine lads too. Let me see now, there's
the oldest one,that's Donal'
he'll be, what?- seventy-two,
aye, seventy-two. Oh, but a very steady lad, tho', a steady
lad.
Then the next one,- that's Peter. He's sixty-four. He's
turning out a bit of a knut. He
didn't come home till half-past-nine
last night. He's beginning to flutter his wings a
wee
bit, I'm thinking.
Then there's the bairn. That's little Alec - wee Eck.
He's fifty. Oh, he's a terrible lad, an
awful comic! He'll
not work, you know. No, no; nothing but play. I saw him
down the
road just now, on his scooter. He's a terrible
boy. I don't think I'll ever be able to rear
that lad
somehow. Mind ye, I had no intention of gettin' married
again. No, I thought I'dhave ended my days in peace.
It was just through a conversation I overheard between
my three lads that decided me to du what I'm goin' to
do. I was passing by the kitchen
about a month ago when
I heard them speaking about me. They were discussin' when
I was goin' to hop it. I heard the oldest one say, "Boys,
the old chap's gettin' very frail!"
Then they started
to divide up all my property before I was dead.
Ah, ah.said I, if that's your gamy, I'll spoil your plans
for you. So that's what I'm goin' to do.I'm goin' to get married.
So, don't run away with the
idea that it's a case of love, as far as
I'm concerned.
It's not love... spite! |
CHORUS:
I'm ninety-four this mornin', Aye, I'm ninety-four today.
I'm not so young as I used to be, I'm gettin' old and grey.
But my heart is young, and I'm fond of fun, And I'm very proud
to say
That I'm gettin' married on Thursday Tho' I'm ninety-four
today. |
