THE DRINKING TEST
by
Alan Lavercombe
  T'was the height of the boozing season
In the land of M & B's Best,
When young Georgie Green, a lad of eighteen
Was taking his drinking test.

For this day was his eighteenth birthday
And there's one thing a lad that age hates:
It's having a provisional licence,
Well, you feel a berk wearing 'L' plates!

It was twelve o'clock sharp on the Sunday
His testing was due to begin
And Georgie was leaning against the front door,
So he'd be the first to fall in.

Course, Georgie was first to the bar to get served,
The examiner was really impressed,
He got full marks for chatting the barmaid,
As he leered down the front of her dress.

For his eye test he read the bar price list,
The examiner sttod back in surprise,
To find the thing, let alone read it,
This lad must have bloody sharp eyes.

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