They was queuein' in t' water to see 'im,
'Cos there weren't no more room on the sands.

Then, when t' pubs chucked out at two thirty,
There'd be, ooh, ... five thousand, I'd say,
Which was more than us 'ad at New Trafford
When Nazareth Town came to play.

Then a copper rode up on 'is camel
To see what the fuss were about,
An' t' crowd says "We've coom to see t' faith-'ealer chap,
That is right .... 'e does it for nowt?"

Then t' Constabule chap says "Tha's missed 'im,
But I saw 'im meself yesterday. 'E' s fixed my poorly knee."
Then 'e points out to sea, an' says
" 'E walked off, ..... Thataway."

Well, some of us tried walkin' after,
But soon found us-selves in a jam,
Well, we'd 'ad some to drink and us started to sink,
So us all made a dash for t' tram.

But t' conductor says "Room for three standing,
An' besides, it'll cost fourpence each."
  That were too much to pay for a ride around t' bay,
So us set off for t' walk along t' beach.

Well, it took us all next day to find 'im,
We were shagged out, me Mam, Dad an' me,
We'd come a long way. "JEEZUS CHRIST!" we say,
"Hey, We bin lookin' all over for thee!"

"We was due back at work Monday mornin',
Now we're all gonna be a day late.
We'll likely get t' sack if us ever gets back.
Tha's cocked up our Passover, mate!"

Then Sam Postlethwaite interrupted,
Says "Excuse me for bein' so rude,
But I'm on t' Catering Committee
And we've run short of brown ale ..... an' food."

"We thought we'd run out altogether,
But the Angling Club chaps stopped an' thought,
They'd five loaves they were using for ground-bait,
Plus the two fish they'd already caught."

"Now, Treasurer an' t' Finance Committee
'Ave just organized a whip-round,
They've raised two hundred p., an' that, let me see,
In the new money that's ..... aye, just two pounds."
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