performed by
Bernard Miles

  I' just been over to ol' Charlies funeral... I seen ol' Nobby at the graveside, he ain't been outside for nigh on six year.
I sez to 'im, "Ow old are you, Nobby?"
'E sez, "Ninety eight."
I sez, "Soon be your turn, won' it?"
'And e' larfed, "I shan't die," 'e sez, "I knows it."
Ha, ha... shouted it at me, like that. "I shan't die." 'e sez.
I wouldn't be surprised if 'e don't, too.
Well, there was a subject over in Old Brie... lived to be a 'undred an' twelve... 'e never died. They went into 'im one morning... 'e wasn't there!... I ain't never seed the goin' of 'im. That was ol' George Elliott... what was.
Aah... but 'e was a wonderful, good workman were Charlie... turn 'is 'and to anything, wonderful man with 'orses... Mr. Buckmaster didn't like to let nobody else 'andle 'is 'Boxie' if 'e could 'elp it. 'E used to gin 'im dandilion leaves... aah, it used to make 'is coat come up lovely... like 'e'd bin knocked all over with a little 'ammer. 'E used to spend 'is Sundays in the stables among the 'orses... 'e did most of 'is courtin' in old Buckmaster's stable.
"If you wants to see me," 'e used to say to these gals, " you'll 'ave to come to stables."
I mind, I sez to 'im one time, I sez, "You mind that schoolmistress over at Slapton... what give you 'alf o'
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