John Edwards (1908)
performed by
Bransby Williams
Billy Bennett
At a certain University not many years ago
There lived a student, learned, wise and slow. 
From flighty feelings he was quite exempt
And all frivolity held in contempt.
In fact for knowledge he was widely noted
And as a model was oft-times quoted.
One fatal day, on serious thoughts intent,
Our hero o'er a ponderous tome was bent, 
Extracting wisdom from its musty pages,
For knowledge is not gained by easy stages.
When a light foot-fall at his door he hears,
And in his room a fair damsel appears.
'What, Sister Madge,' cried he with unfeigned glee,
'Sit down my dear, we'll have some tea.' 
They whiled away the hours with pleasant chat
Of plays, pictures, and her last new hat.
When suddenly at the door there came a loud rat-tat.
Brother and sister both exclaimed 'Tut tut. What's that?'
'Oh,' said the youth, with reassuring look,
'Twill be some fellow student for a book.
You get behind those curtains there - just so
And in a moment I'll make him go.'
Then turning to the door which he opened wide,
There a grey wizened old man espied. 
'Excuse me, sir,' the ancient one began,
'I occupied these rooms some fifty years ago,
And thought I'd like to see them once again before I died.'
'With pleasure sir, just step inside and look around. 
You'll find them interesting, I'll be bound.' 
'Ah me! the same old place I see once more,
The same old ceiling and the same old floor.
The same old grate where I have often sat till very, very late.
The same old window and the same old view.'
Then he the curtains wide apart withdrew, 
His quick eye resting on the dame, he chuckled,
'Aye, aye, aye, and the same old game.' 
'Excuse me, sir,' said the youth, hurt at the slur,
'This lady is my sister sir!'
The old man smiled and quick to make reply
Said, 'I beg your pardon, Sister? 
Oh! Aye, aye, aye and the same old lie!' 
The end