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GOSSIP CALYPSO
by
Bernard Cribbins

Gossip calypso Gossip calypso
Hear all about it yak a yak yak
Every woman up at the window
Giving out the gossip and getting it back

Oh Mrs Brown, well how are you now, I tell you,
I've had a shocking time with Ern and his stomach
Don't talk to me, my Charlie has gone and fallen down the stairs again, saints preserve us
Poor old chap, did he hurt himself well, not as much as
Alf that's my cousin Freds boy I learnt from Fred,
the doctor said, he'll have to have his kneecaps straight, gor blimey singing

Gossip calypso Gossip calypso
Hear all about it yak a yak yak
Every woman up at the window
Giving out the gossip and getting it back

Mrs Booze, have you heard the news that woman,
you know the very fat one down at the corner
Climbed in a truck, got stuck, they think that they never gonna get her out, do tell me
Well I had a feller round and gave him a pound, to free her with an oxyacetaline welder
Must send along some books, it looks like she's gonna be there quite some time, cor blimey singing

Gossip calypso Gossip calypso
Hear all about it yak a yak yak
Every woman up at the window
Giving out the gossip and getting it back

Oh Mrs Ware I do like your hair who does it,
I go to Madame Pom Pom round by the gas works
With all that fruit, it looks so cute, I can't believe it it's really you, like a film star
Have you heard dear, a little bird has told me Mrs Tate's expecting her seventh
Well glory be, that's three, she's had since Lenny had his tonsils out, cor blimey singing

Gossip calypso Gossip calypso
Hear all about it yak a yak yak
Every woman up at the window
Giving out the gossip and getting it back

 
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