THE HIKING SONG
by
Max Miller



A boy took his girl to the seaside
One Sunday morn in July;
They hadn't seen much of each other,
So, sunbathing they thought they'd try.

With only seaweed for a costume,
They lay on the sands all the day,
But now they've seen more of each other
'Cos the tide washed the seaweed away.

A boy and a girl went out hiking,
Of course, they were both wearing shorts;
They stopped at the old 'Pig and Whistle',
And there had a couple of ports.

When they got back the same evening,
The neighbours all started to quiz,
For he came home late wearing her shorts...
She came home late wearing his.

Down on the farm in the country
A funny thing happened one day,
The hen and the rooster were talking,
Here's what they both had to say:

Said the rooster, "I can't understand it,
You used to lay eggs by the score."
Said the hen, "Well, old cock, I can't help it...
You don't come around anymore."

One day a girl she was bathing,
The maid said, "Here comes Mr. Tree".
She said, "All right, bring him here to me...
He's quite safe, the poor chap can't see."

She stood there like beautiful Venus,
When into the bathroom walked Jack.
He Said, "I've just come to tell you...
Today I got my eyesight back."

An old man of ninety got married,
The bride was so young and so bold,
In his car they both went honeymooning...
She married the old man for gold.

A year later he was a daddy,
At ninety he still had the knack;
He took one look at the baby...
And then gave the chauffeur the sack.