WOT SUMMER?
by
Pam Davies
This summer is taking the mickey!
Pretending to be what it's not!
It's terribly flooded and rainy and cold
and it's s'posed to be terribly 'ot!
I ventured out in me sandals,
that was a massive mistake.
Followed by snickers, I should have worn flippers,
knowing the road is a lake.
Normally slugs are a problem,
eating me lettuce and such,
This year a trout, in the flood took 'em out.
What do I think of that? Well not much!
"Buy lots of cactus!" they told us.
"Plants that will not need a drink!"
They're quite a sight, in the miserable light.
Quite a spectacle watching 'em sink!
I like to go to the seaside,
when there's a sun in the sky.
Now I've a spot, in the vegetable plot,
very similar now the tide's high! 
I bought a lovely bikini,
with pretty lace on the cup,
I won't be wearing it but I'll be sharing it,
helping the neighbours mop up!
I'm thinking now, roll on winter,
let's 'ave some weather that's fine.
Christmas was warmer, a tree in the corner
and plenty of cake and mulled wine!
But maybe this warming the planet,
is not such a terrible thing,
All of this will be solved, when in time we've evolved
and we're born with two gills and a fin!
The end