"I recognise yon little devil," says Mother,
"Wi't cap on, there, second from't right."

Well, no-one knew quite what had happened,
How Albert had got into't plane...
He were plummeting down with no parachute on,
So there wasn't no time to explain.

He fell through the air like a golf ball -
How lucky that there should have been
Agert pile of straw in a hopper,
That was part of a baling machine...

So, Albert fell into the hopper,
And the lid came on down with a bang,
And it bashed and it thrashed and it rattled,
And the big wheel went round with a clang,

And Mother, who'd seen the occurance,
Ran to the attendant and cried -
"Look out for a bale with a cap on,
'Cos it's got our Albert inside!"

"If you ask me..." said Father, but nobody did,
Then sure enough, tidy and trim,
Asmart and oblongular package popped out,
And Father says "Eyup! That's him!"
  "It's me!" said young Albert, from inside the bale,
"Come out of there," Mother replied.
"It's time we were going," said Father.
"We might as well leave him inside."

"It's an ill wind..." said Mother, reflecting,
"I reckon it's worth all the fuss,
'Cos Albert'll count as a parcel,
When we take him back home on the bus..."

There's many fine sights at Royal Lancashire Show,
But the finest, without any doubt,
Was the day the red Devils went flying,
And Albert Ramsbottom... baled out.


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