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Parodies
 
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IF
(Anon)

If you can keep yourself from going crackers
At all the things you are advised to do
When Hitler sends his horrid air attackers
With squibs and bombs to try and frighten you.
If you can hear that awful banshee warning
Without that sinking feeling in your chest;
If you can sit in dugouts until morning
And never feel you ought to have more rest.
If you can laugh at every blackout stumble
Not murmur when you cannot find a pub;
If you can eat your rations and not grumble
About the wicked price you pay for grub.
If you can keep depression down to zero
And view it all as just a bit of fun,
Then, sir, you'll be a flaming hero,
And what is more - you'll be the only one!
 
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