'E didn't care 'ow thick they came, 'e didn't care 'ow tall;
Hardwood or soft, a tree was just a tree to Samuel Small.
They declared 'im "Sam, the Chopper", and every mother's son
Declared at chopping trees down Samuel Small was champion.

Then one day at the meeting 'ouse a messenger appeared
And 'anded them a message which started out, "We've 'eered
About this man named Sam 'oo's good at chopping down a tree,
If 'e's open for a challenge, let us know R.S.V.P."

It was Jamestown in Virginia where the challenge 'ad been sent,
So Sam packed up 'is toothbrush and 'is axes and 'e went.
'E 'ad to cross a forest, 'e wos groping through the trees
When 'e 'eard what sounded strangely like a million buzzing bees.
  'E discovered it wos arrows, the outlook was rather grave,
If they missed 'im any closer, they'd 'ave given 'im a shave.
Then suddenly 'e 'eard a loud and most blood-curdling shout,
And 'e stopped and said, "That does it... there are Indians about!"

Sam turned and looked and saw that there were injuns everywhere
Dressed up in almost nothink but some feathers in their 'air.
Sam 'ad never met them socially, and didn't want to now
'E decided to ignore them... but it didn't work some'ow.

They tied 'im to a sapling and started in to whoop;
Sam could see 'twas their intention to convert 'im into soup.
They danced a silly dance and then one redskin jitterbug
Took off Sam's 'at to scalp 'im, and let out a startled " Ugh!"
Continue Return