Sam nodded. "You'd better obey me, my lad,"
Said Sergeant, "Or I'll see you 'ung."
And Sam, being dumb and a little bit mad,
Made a raspberry noise with 'is tongue.

The Sergeant spoke up, with 'is neck turning red,
In a voice that would wither a tree:
"If that's 'ow you feel, my good fellow," 'e said,
"Fall in, forward march, follow me."

'E marched Sam away from the camp to the coast
Until Sam's feet was dying of grief,
And 'e said, "You're on guard, Sam, and this is your post.
You will march till I send you relief."

Sam nodded 'is 'ead and the Sergeant was gone,
'E shouldered 'is musket and then
'E started in marching from 'ither to yon,
Then marched back to 'ither again.
  It was Sam, Sam, Sam, Sam, moving to and fro again
Left foot right foot, sojers must obey
Boots, boots, boots, boots, steady 'ere we go again
Marching up and down upon the road to Mandalay.

When the Sergeant got back 'e found camp in a roar.
"What was it?" 'e wanted to know,
And 'e found that somebody 'ad started a war
And 'is troop 'ad been summoned to go.

'E inspected 'is men and 'e found them okay
With their muskets, equipment and all,
And they boarded a steamer and 'urried away
Completely forgetting Sam Small.

When the war 'ad been going on three years or so
A Hindu out riding a camel
Saw a man on the seashore who walked to and fro,
And, lo and behold, it was Sam!

"How do you do," said the Hindu to Sam,
Sam nodded and said, "Howdy, Chief."
"Are you tired?" said the Hindu. Said Samuel, "I am,
Why don't they send my relief?"
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