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THE POINTSMAN'S STORY
by
Edward Kent

We challenge our readers to produce a more improbable story than this.

“Shall I tell you the tale of a pointsman?
For I was a pointsman once,
And at changing the signals and lights
I assure you that I was no dunce.
Well, one night I had stopped a goods train,
It was standing just outside my box,
When I heard the ‘up’ Express train approaching,
The 10.10 from Tilbury Docks.
And the goods train was right in her way,
And in the Express was my wife,
Well, I hadn’t a second to spare,
No! I hadn’t got time to say “Knife”

On the goods train were some barrels of powder,
So I runs out and pulls ‘em down quick,
Breaks ‘em open - pours out the gunpowder,
Just as the Express came in sight.
Then I strikes a match, yes, to light it,
But the fuse it refuses to light,
The Express it comes nearer and nearer,
So I quietly lights it again.
Then I bolts, for the powder exploded,
And blew up that darned goods train,
The Express had come up by that time,
Just as the goods train blew up on high,
So for one second the main line was clear
In that time the Express had passed by!”
 
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