TROUBLE IN STORE
by
Cliff Reeves

“These holiday snaps are small” said my dearest,
“And I told 'em I wanted big whoppers,
You can go into town and get them blown up,
At that new place, yer know, Supashoppers”.

So, I sauntered on down to this Superstore,
With our holiday photographs,
And asked a man with clipboard,
“I believe there’s a Supasnaps”.

With smug expression his recital began,
“Yes, we’ve Supasnaps, that’s true,
Supadrug and Supacigs
And tubes of Superglue.

Super heavy metal bands,
Video’s of Superleague’
The Superstars of Formula 1,
At Supersonic speed.

If you’re thirsty we’ve got Supawines,
If your hungry a Supagrill,
Everything goes in the Supatrolly,
Pay at the Supatill”.

I looked him in the mouth and screamed,
“ Your Supermans decendent”
A uniformed guard introduced himself,
“ I’m Powers the Superintendent.

You’re abusing a Supervisor”
I said “do you mean old Supergob”
“This lads got managerial potential” he said,
“ And you’re just a troublesome yob”

I said, “look all I want are enlargements,
Not this Superidiots guide to the store,
I’ll show you the photographs if you like,
He said, “ I’ll show you the door”.

I went home for tea and sympathy,
But got only rage and rigour,
She said, “So you’ve time to show yer self up,
But not time to get photos made bigger.

Yer useless you yer can’t do ‘owt,
‘Cept go round causin’ a riot”
She kept going on, so I took myself off,
To the pub for some peace and quiet.