ALL THE NICE GIRLS ARE IN THE BALLROOM
 
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The First Man wanted something and he didn't take long to find it
Beneath an apple tree, met his affinity
The Apple tempted Adam and he didn't seem to mind it
It's much the same today, but they meet in a different way.

Chorus: All the nice girls are in the ballroom
You'll find the girls all there
Little shorts frocks, little pink shoes
Doing the fox, shimmy or blues
All the wise boys know where to find them, dark girls or fair
Sweet Phyllis says to Percy, 'Oh don't come so close dear
That elegant moustache of yours keeps ticling my ear.'
For all the nice girls are in the ballroom,
Handing out apples there.

The Strand's deserted after tea, and so is Piccadilly
The ones for whom you long, have vanished from the throng
So lonely in the wilderness you wander like a silly
Where are the girls, you sigh? and there's only one reply,

Chorus: All the nice girls are in the ballroom
You'll find the girls all there
Little shorts frocks, little pink shoes
Doing the fox, shimmy or blues
All the wise boys know where to find them, dark girls or fair
And Mr Adam up-to-date, when he wants a 'she'
Don't have to go noseing round some old apple tree
For all the nice girls are in the ballroom,
Handing out apples there.

 
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Written and composed by Harry Castling & Bennett Scott - 1925
Performed by Ella Shields (1879-1952)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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