AS IF I DIDN'T KNOW
(By a copper)
 
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Believe me when I say I am a member good as gold
A strictly proper member who is firm, yet never bold
I always do my duty and I practice what I preach
A many a useful lesson to a genuine pal I teach.

Chorus: As if I didn't know, you must think I'm silly
Three years a beat in Regent Street, the same in Piccadilly
Seen ev'ry shade of character, the highest to the low
And then to talk to me like that, as if I didn't know.

The magistrates all praise my zeal, and put me down A1.
And burglars when they hear my step, instantly cut and run
They sometimes drop things in their flight, those things of course I take
To leave them there to tempt the poor, would be a great mistake.

Chorus:

Now, many of our boys prefer a beat outside the town
They've better opportunities to feed and spoon I own
But 'subbubs' and the girls is stale, a town beat suits me best
Especially this one now I'm on, of all give me the West

Chorus:

 
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Written and composed by Harry Adams & E. Jonghmans - 1884
Performed by James Fawn (1850-1923)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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