Once I bought a house through a building Society
Thinking when I paid for it, it would belong to me
But Oh, I was wrong, for the more I spent upon it
The further off from being mine the dwelling seemed to be
When I bought the house I thought that it would pay
To make a few improvements, but dear-a-me today

Chorus: Am I the landlord, or am I not?
Sometimes I think I am, and then I think I'm not
The building society wants to claim the spot
And my landlord he wants to have the lot
Now what I want to know before going off my dot
Is, who does the house belong to?

I only bought the house as a little speculation
Intending very soon to settle and retire
But when I went to make a few slight alterations
I found I'd only got it like a mangle on the hire
What I wished to do was to build a chicken's run
A simple little thing in an hour could be done
The Council interferred, I stood 'em like a mouse
They said I'd have to move the run or else pull down the house.

Written and composed by Dan Leno & Herbert Darnley - 1901
Performed by Dan Leno (1860-1904)
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