THE ESKIMO
 
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Oh, Oh, Oh, I'm an Eskimo, 'neath a blanket of snow I sleep
Every night whenthe moon shines bright, to our bed so cold we creep
When slumbering we go you'll see us in a row
All the bally tribe, snoring in the snow
Once a maiden I could see, sleeping just near me.

Chorus: Zam Dammy, Zam Dammy, Zam Buk Joe
That's my name you know - I'm an Eskimo
In the snow that girl was rolled, her snow blanket looked so cold
That I thought I'd fire a light
But her blanket melted with the heat of the fire
And I didn't shut my eyes all night.

Oh, Oh, Oh, I'm an Eskimo, to the North Pole once I went
Packed my socks in a small tin box, to explore the Pole I meant
I bought an aeroplane, I must have been insane
If I go there again I shall go by train
Found the Pole at last all right, then cried out with delight,

Chorus: Zam Dammy, Zam Dammy, Zam Buk Joe
That's my name you know - I'm an Eskimo
I began to climb the Pole
Cried, 'At last I've reached my goal
When something struck my jaw
And my wife cried, 'Come back to bed, you fool
What are you climbing up the bedpost for?'

Oh, Oh, Oh, I'm an Eskimo, lots of animals wild I've shot
Once in fear, I cried, 'Oh dear, no bullets have I got.'
A savage an-i-mile looked at me with a smile
To shiver I began, freezing all the while
But though tears began to flow, was I afraid? Oh no,

Chorus: Zam Dammy, Zam Dammy, Zam Buk Joe
That's my name you know - I'm an Eskimo
My tears all froze as they ran
I dropped each one in my gun
Then I fired at the bear pell mell
I riddled that bear, I'm a very clever shot
I'm a very clever liar as well

Oh, Oh, Oh, I'm an Eskimo, all the goatmaids love me too
I cried Oh to a maid I know, 'Let me milk your goat for you.'
For over an hour the milk fell in a shower
I kept milking till the milk turned sour
Said the goatmaid, 'Here I say, are you going to milk all day?'

Chorus: Zam Dammy, Zam Dammy, Zam Buk Joe
That's my name you know - I'm an Eskimo
I sat there for an hour or more
Milked until my hands got sore
Then the maid began to scoff
I said, 'Don't laugh, I can milk it alright
But I can't turn the darned thing off.'

 
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Performed by Sam Mayo (1875-1938)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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