THE GOOSE AND THE GOLDEN EGGS
 
div
 

Once there was a fairy in a Christmas pantomime,
She could dance upon her toes in manner quite sublime,
I went dancing after her in all my Sunday clothes,
She was 'fly' and very soon she had me by the nose.

Chorus: Mabel! Mabel! that was the darling's name;
I was mad and with me she had a nice old game;
First she petted me, then she 'sweated' me, took me off my legs,
She was the fairy and I was the goose that laid the golden eggs!

Ev'ry time she waved her wand the Goose was sure to lay,
For everything the Fairy wished the Goosey had to pay;
When she wanted diamond rings she didn't have to beg,
Simply touched him on the tail and Goosey laid his egg.

Chorus:

Such a cosy little nest he built her in the 'Wood',
Goosey meant to marry her, of course, 'twas understood,
Till one day at Bow Street, lo! the Fairy Queen was fined,
For biting off a policeman's ear, then Goosey changed his mind.

Chorus:

In the Breach of Promise Court we have the final scene,
Judge and Jury, all in love with the Fairy Queen;
Damages, five hundred quid, for that gay, giddy maid!
The poor old bird put down the 'oof' and his last egg was laid!

Chorus:

 
div
 
Written and composed by T.W. Connor - 1896
Performed by George Beauchamp (1863-1901)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
div
 
 
home spaceA spaceB spaceC spaceD spaceE spaceF spaceG spaceH spaceI spaceJ spaceK spaceL spaceM spaceN spaceO spaceP spaceQ spaceR spaceS spaceT spaceU spaceV spaceW spaceX spaceY spaceZ