HER MOTHER'S AT THE BOTTOM OF IT ALL
 
div
 

Once I was a gay young gusher, up to every move in town,
Till I met with such a crusher, now I'm like a clock run down.
I've been treated most severely by a cruel, wicked wife,
I've been spifflicated nearly; twice I've tried to take my life.

Chorus: All through a woman with a coal-black eye,
All through a woman who was false and sly,
For when she said she loved me she told a wicked lie,
And her mother's at the bottom of it all.

How we met, 'twas quite romantic, in the maze at Hampton Court,
Love, I thought, would drive me frantic, in three weeks the ring I bought
A peck of rice, a bag of slippers, brought but one small week of bliss,
Ma-in-law she came to see us; then my hair came out like this,

Chorus:

Now I'm always in hot water, nothing that I do is right,
If I row, my eldest daughter brings her young man home to fight
I've been bruised from top to bottom, yet compelled to keep it dark,
They took care I always got 'em where you couldn't see the mark.

Chorus:

 
div
 
Performed by Dan Leno (1860-1904)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
div
 
 
home spaceA spaceB spaceC spaceD spaceE spaceF spaceG spaceH spaceI spaceJ spaceK spaceL spaceM spaceN spaceO spaceP spaceQ spaceR spaceS spaceT spaceU spaceV spaceW spaceX spaceY spaceZ