She never seemed to understand the proper way to spoon
Her young man asked her recently to sit upon his knee
When she at last consented, she behaved so bashfully.
Chorus: She'd never been there before, never been there before
She felt so shy till Mr Brown
Started to bounce her up and down
Then it was all serene, it filled her with delight
She'd never been there before, but now she's going there every night.
A curate had a notion once that made him very sad
He used to think that ballet girls were everything that's bad
Said he, 'I'll go and preach to them' he meant to give them 'beans'
But didn't he feel funny when he got behind the scenes.
Chorus: He'd never been there before, never been there before
He got on well with the ladies there
Some of the beauties curled his hair
Tickled him in the ribs, it filled him with delight
He'd never been there before, but now he's going there every night.
One night a burly policemen was a-strolling on his beat
And chanced to turn his lantern down an 'airy' from the street
The cook was standing on the steps, she cried, "Oh deary me
I feel so very lonely, won't you keep me company.”
Chorus: He'd never been there before, never been there before
He found the cookie a regular treat
Discovered a lovely joint of meat
Cuddled the slavey's waist, squeezed it nice and tight
He'd never been there before, but now he's going there every night.
A lady friend of mine whose husband's such a stingy man
Resolved at last to work upon the good old fashioned plan
So while the beauty slept one night, she seized upon the chance
Jumped out of bed, and dived into the pockets of his pants.
Chorus: She'd never been there before, never been there before
She felt so awfully pleased to see,
That Willy was snoring peacefully
Only took half-a crown and nearly died of fright
She'd never been there before, but she's going there every night.
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