I CAN SAY 'TRULY RURAL'
 
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I've just been out with the boys,
It's my birthday and I might as well say,
I've just been out with the boys.
The wife said to me, 'Dear, I can't wait up,
So when you come home, tonight,
If I'm in bed, just shout 'Truly Rural'
Then I shall know you're alright!
I've been out since four, well I've had a full day
But still, all the same, I'm delighted to say...

Chorus: I can say truly rural, truly rural. truly rural.
It's past midnight but I'm alright,
'Coz I can say truly rural.
I can say truly rural, it's as simple as can be.
And if you can say truly rural too,
Then you're as sober as me.


Repeat Chorus:

I've just been out with the boys,
I've told you so but I want you to know,
I've just been out with the boys.
I'm going to do a bit of good,
When you arrive home tonight.
Your wife might want you to say truly rural.
Well, I'm going to put you alright.
It's as simple, as simple, as simple can be.
So every husband, just try it with me...

Chorus: I can say truly rural, truly rural. truly rural.
It's past midnight but I'm alright,
'Coz I can say truly rural.
I can say truly rural, it's as simple as can be.
And if you can say truly rural too,
Then you're as sober as me.


Repeat Chorus:
 
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Performed by Wilkie Bard (1874-1944)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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