I'D LIKE ONE LIKE PA HAD YESTERDAY
 
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Tho' I'm a kid, I ain't a kid who simple can be called
I likes the things what Pa likes, 'cos he's tricky, tho' he's bald
Just Yesterday Ma says, "Would little Freddy like a drink?"
I says, "You try me, Muvver, Would I like one? Wot you fink?

Chorus: "I'd like one like Pa had yesterday
The one wot made him fall
If I can't have one like Pa had yesterday
I won't have none at all."

Ma gave a children's party once, but girls is silly things
And I ain't one of them boys wot likes kissing 'em, in rings
Ma says, "You kiss the little girls, 'twill fill your heart with bliss."
I says, "Beg pardon, muvver, but if I must have a kiss,

Chorus: "I want one like Pa had yesterday
When he kissed the housemaid in the hall
If I can't have one like Pa had yesterday
I won't have none at all."

Ma's shockingly religious, and wants me to be the same
But no, I'm wicked like Papa, and, pray, where is the blame?
One day, she started singing hymns, then asked in front of Pa
"What sort of hymns did Freddy like?" I answered, Well, Mamma,

Chorus: "I like 'em like Pa heard yesterday,
You know, at the music hall
If I can't have hymns like Pa had yesterday
I don't want none at all."

I went to see some skating once, along wiv dear Papa
And ev'ry time a girl went down, Oh he did laugh, ha, ha
Next day Ma bought some stockings - all especially for me
She said, "Which sort would you like best?" I said, "Well, let me see,

Chorus: "I'd like some like Pa saw yesterday
When them there ladies done a fall
If I can't have some like Pa saw yesterday
I don't want none at all."

 
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Written and composed by J.P. Harrington & George Le Brunn - 1895
Performed by Constance Moxon
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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