IF I EVER CEASE TO LOVE
 
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In a house, in a square, in a quadrant
In a street, in a lane, in a road
Turn to the left, on the right hand
You see there my true love's abode
I go there a courting and cooing
To my love, like a dove
And swearing on my bended knee
If I ever cease to love
May sheep heads grow on apple trees.

Chorus: If I ever cease to love
If I ever cease to love
May the moon be turned into green cheese
If I ever cease to love.


She can sing, she can play the piano
She can jump, she can dance, she can run
In fact she's a modern Taglioni
And Sims Reeves rolled into one
And who would not love such a beauty
Like an angel dropped from above
May I be stung to death with flies
If I ever cease to love
May I be stung to death with flies
If I ever cease to love.

Chorus: If I ever cease to love
If I ever cease to love
May little dogs wag their tails in front
If I ever cease to love.


For all the money that's in the bank
For the title of a Lord or a Duke
I wouldn't exchange the girl I love
There's bliss in every look
To see her dance the Polka
I could faint with radiant love
May the Monument a hornpipe dance
If I ever cease to love
May we never have to pay the Income Tax
If I ever cease to love.

Chorus: If I ever cease to love
If I ever cease to love
May we all turn into cats and dogs
If I ever cease to love.


May all the seas turn into ink
May Negroes all turn white
May the Queen in Buckingham Palace live
May wrong be turned to right
May cows lay eggs, may fowl yield milk
May the hawk become a dove
May bobbies refuse to eat cold meat
If I ever cease to love
May I be frozen to death with heat
If I ever cease to love.

Chorus: If I ever cease to love
If I ever cease to love
May a sane man adore his mother-in-law
If I ever cease to love.
 
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Written, composed and performed by George Leybourne (1842-1884)
 
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