I'LL BE CROSS, ARABELLA, I'LL BE CROSS
 
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I'm a man with a terrible temper
The least thing upsets me you see
I'm married of course. A blind man could perceive
That there's something the matter with me
My wife is an absolute angel
Still we have little tiffs, by the way
Today she said something that vexed me
But she trembled when she heard me say.

'I'll be cross, Arabella, I'll be cross
And the parlour door for spite I'll go and slam
Some night you'll aggravateme, I'll be doing something rash
I'll be stamping on the floor and saying damn
I'll show you once for all that I'm determined
And that of this house I'm boss
If you don't remove this poker that you've buried in me head
I'll be cross, Arabella, I'll be cross.'

I'm a man with a masterful manner
I'm firm with the wife, 'cos that's best
Last week I got angry when she came to bed
'Cos she placed her cold feet on me chest
Her feet were so cold I she vowed after
She would always wears stockings in bed
Last night when she warmed her feet on me
Then I foamed in my rage and I said,

'I'll be cross, Arabella, I'll be cross
And I'll go outside and tumble in the dirt
Some night you'll make me desperate
I'll commit some awful crime
I'll get mad and I'm sure to tear me shirt
You said with socks you'd cover up your cold feet
But I'll show you I'm no joss
If you ever come to bye-bye's with your bluchers on again
I'll be cross, Arabella, I'll be cross.'

I'm a beast when I get in a passion
My darling's too faithful to me
They're quite lost on me, her sweet pretty ways
Such as landing home frisky at three
And she being what you'd call pious
Has tea-total brethren to tea
Last night 'twas a temperance bandsman
So I shouted out, 'Listen to me,

I'll be cross, Arabella, I'll be cross
And I'll bang my head against the window sill
Some day you'll aggravate me till me blood begins to boil
Then I'll go and catch the measles so I will
I can stand converted bandsmen calling on you
But as sure as your name's Floss
But if you bring Converted Scottie in his go-to-meeting kilt
I'll be cross, Arabella, I'll be cross.'
 
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Performed by Jack Pleasants (1874-1924)
 
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