I'LL KEEP OFF THE GRASS NO MORE
 
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There's a notice that you often pass
And it says, 'Please keep off the grass'
Now that's what makes me blue
Doing things I don't want to
But I'm going to do those things no more.

Chorus: I am turning Bolshevic
Out of life I'm going to get some kick
Oh, I'll be a little devil for
I'm going to keep off the grass no more
Yes, and from the vicar's daughter Bess
I'll borrow the 'Well of Loneliness'
Oh, I'll be a little devil for
I'm going to keep off the grass no more.

I will flirt with married women, I'll be living in shame
You can tell all your vicar's
I've seen Tallulah in her camiknickers
A panic 'mongst the kids I'll cause
When I tell them all that there is no Sant Claus
Oh, I'll be a little devil for
I'm going to keep off the grass no more.

Some folks say they must do as they're told
But they get left out in the cold
Now I refuse to be tied up in red tape, not me
I will tell old Dora where to go.

Chorus: I am turning Bolshevic
Out of life I'm going nto get some kick
Oh, I'll be a little devil for
I'm going to keep off the grass no more
To annoy a p'liceman on his beat
I'll drive up and down a one way street
Oh, I'll be a little devil for
I'm going to keep off the grass no more.

I won't pay my wireless license, they can prosecute me
And at a cocktail party I'll grab a lemon squash and say, drink hearty
When on the phone a girl tells me
To press button A I'm going to press button B
Oh, I'll be a little devil for
I'm going to keep off the grass no more.

 
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Written and composed by W.J. Stafford - 1930
Performed by Billy Merson (1881-1947)
 
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