THE INVERARY HARRIERS
 
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The Inverary Harriers went oot tae have a run
There were just eleven members all resolved tae ha' some fun
One took a feed o' porridge, and we'll no see him again
The oats were made of saw-dust, so that left only ten.

Chorus: And I'm the last o' the lads sae braw
That wore the kilt and plaid
An' a' nae mair the bagpipes they will blaw
On the hills o' Inverary.


Ten Inverary Harriers went fleein' doon the street
But their hands were very tender, so they ran upon their feet
One lay in front a tram-car - tried tae knock it off the line
The car was rather heavy - so that left only nine.

Chorus:

The nine braw Heilan' Harriers were jumping o'er the stream
An' they did it - aye they did it - except one fellow in the team
He's underneath the water yet, and there he'll ha' tae-wait
Till they come wi' grapplin' irons - so that left only eight.

Chorus:

The Harriers were passing by a powder magazine
And one of chanced tae say it was a place he'd never seen
He said 'twas rather dark, and so a match tae him was giv'n
He went inside and struck it - so that left only seven.

Chorus:

The Harriers were passing by a famous music hall
And one of them went inside - o' course, he had nae right at all
He tried to sing a comic song and do some funny tricks
The audience started on him - so that left only six.

Chorus:

And then six speedy Harriers sat doon tae tak' a rest
One declared he'd let 'em try tae break a stone upon his chest
They fetched a hammer quickly, and, as sure as I'm alive
They missed the stone an' hit him - so that left only five.

Chorus:

Five nimble-footed Harriers, without a sign of fear
Started running through the meadow where a big bull did appear
One of 'em tried to chase it, but the bull it gave a roar
And the lad got elevated - so that left only four.

Chorus:

One stopped a golf-ball with his eye, and then they numbered three
And the reason was because there were the other two and me
One of the three got spooney on a little girl in blue
And with her he skidaddled - so that left only two.

Chorus:

The two remaining Harriers were deein' for a smoke
And the big one he said, 'Laddie, I maun ha' a puff or choke'
He went and found a shooting range and had a shot for fun
Got a cigar and smoked it - so that left only one.

Chorus: And I'm the last o' the lads sae braw
That wore the kilt and plaid
An' a' nae mair the bagpipes they will blaw
On the hills o' Inverary, and rary.
 
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Performed by Harry Lauder (1870-1950)
 
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