IT'S THE ONLY BIT OF COMFORT I'VE GOT
 
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Some day, well so they tell me we shall all be better off
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
We shall wear no kind of clothing, but we'll never catch a cough
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
We shall have a pair of wings with which to fly about the air
And no pawning togs on quarter day for rent, cos we shan't care
But we'll get no screw on Saturday, and nobody will swear
It's the only bit of comfort that I've got.

Chorus: For I've had a deal of trouble in my married life of late
I've a wife I think could fairly talk the hinges off a gate
But it's going to be different in that happy future state
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got.


We shall have no work to look for in that happy time to come
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
And if we don't like to work at all the 'missus' won't look glum
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
I shall find the 'blossom' then disappearing from my nose
We shall all be nice and equal, with the same amount of clothes
But what some of us will look like then, well, goodness only knows
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got

Chorus: We shall all be happy children, yes, and always on the grin
We shall never know the evils of a pocket full of tin
For we'll have no trouser pockets then to put the ha'pence in
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got.


In the happy time that's coming we shall get our liquors free
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
It's necessary sometimes, that's why I take two or three
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
We shall all sit in the parlour and be fairly 'on the job'
We shall call for what we like, and put our feet upon the hob
But they'll be no running into 'quod' or fining forty bob
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got.

Chorus: For although I'm glad to say that
My drinking powers were never great
It's glorious to think that in a future happy state
I can get a fair old skinful, and it won't go on the slate
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got.


We shall have no politicians then to ask us for our vote
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
And liberals and tories then will never 'turn their coat'
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got
It's glorious to think we'll have no character to lose
There will be no one to wake us if we want to have a snooze
And nobody to jaw us when we go out on the booze
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got.

Chorus: We shall all be kind and gentle and shall lead a happy life
We shall go straight home on Saturday, without a sign of strife
P'raps they'll let me 'swap' my missus then, for someone else's wife
That's the only bit of comfort that I've got.
 
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Performed by J.J. Dallas (1847-1915)
 
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