I'VE LOST ALL AMBITION IN LIFE
 
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My father was a sailor, he sailed away one morn
Got stranded on an island on the day that I was born
But ten years after, he came home, when we all thought him dead
He saw me for the first time, 'well, if that's my son' he said,

Chorus: 'I've lost all ambition in life
Don't let me see him any more
I never felt so dreary, so weary before
Now ain't you ashamed of your face,'
Pa said as he picked up a knife
When I looked in the mirror I said 'You're quite right
I've lost all ambition in life.'


I thought I'd married money, the day I married Loo
But on our wedding morn, I found she hadn't got a sou
The pason said, as we stood at the altar to be wed
'Will you take this woman to be your wife?' 'Do what you like ' I said

Chorus: 'I've lost all ambition in life
I don't want to live any more
I never felt so dreary, so weary before.'
A mangle was all she possessed
Which I have to turn for the wife
In a large prambulator I push mangling home
I've lost all ambition in life.


I'm such a desparate gambler, I'd gamble with my life
I've lost my wages many times, and tried to lose my wife
I once sat down and gambled from eight o'clock till four
Then stopped, but someone said, 'Play on'
Said I, 'I'll lose no more'

Chorus: 'I've lost all ambition in life
I don't want to lose any more
I never felt so dreary, so weary before
I cried, 'I'm a ruined man now. Oh, what shall I say to the wife
Out of three-pence, I've only got three ha'pence left
I've lost all ambition in life.'


While dancing at a party, I nearly had a fit
My trousers fitted much too tight, at last I heard them split
I sat down in a corner just to hide my grief and woe
A girl said, 'Won't you dance with me? I answered, 'No, no, no.'

Chorus: 'I've lost all ambition in life
I don't want to dance any more
I never felt so dreary, so weary before
She said, 'dance with me pretty one.'
I answered, 'I'll wait for my wife
For until she comes back with a few safety pins
I've lost all ambition in life.'
 
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Performed by Jack Pleasants (1874-1924)
 
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