I'VE ONLY BEEN MARRIED A WEEK
 
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I've only been married just one week today
I'm sorry to say, sorry to say
I've only been married one week to me wife
And I'm sick of me life, sick of me life
Oh, what a beautiful temper she's got
She's just like a tiger, she ought to be shot
Last night she made me sleep out in the yard
And told me that I ought to do 'six months hard.'

Chorus: And I've only been married a week
It's a week too long for me
I've only been married a week
And I'm full of misery
What a life, what a wife
Oh, hasn't she got some cheek
Last night she made me sleep out with the fowls
And I've only been married a week.


What she had to tell me when we left the church
Knocked me off me perch, right off me perch
'I've a secret to tell you,' said she
She told it to me, told it to me
She said that she had been married before
And when we got home, round the table I saw
Two sloppy girls and a fat headed lad
She said, 'I'm their Mother and you are their Dad.'

Chorus: And I've only been married a week
It's a week too long for me
I've only been married a week
And I'm full of misery
What a life, what a wife
Oh, hasn't she got some cheek
There's three men with whiskers all calling me Dad
And I've only been married a week.


"I shan't get married again".
 
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Written and performed by Charles Austin (1877-1944)
 
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