MY MOTHER'S SO PARTICULAR WITH ME
 
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My Mother, Missis Woodbee, has a family of ten
There would be more Woodbee's but father died
Since then my Mother's tried so hard to keep us all well dressed
You'll see by me how hard my Mother's tried
I'm on my holidays from school, but what with Mother's clack
I'll be glad when I go back.

Chorus: My Mother's so particular with me
She makes my life a perfect misery
I mustn't go to music halls nor to a picture show
And when a feller's my age, he has wild oats to sow
I've caught no end of flappers but I've had to let them go
My Mother's so particular with me.


In case I hear too much she's filled my ears with cotton wool
And, once when at a picture gallery
She made me wear green spectacles for fear I saw too much
The saucy pictures quite appealed to me
But Mother gently tugged my ear, each one that I looked at
And whispered, 'Come on Reginald, that's quite enough of that.'

Chorus: My Mother's so particular with me
We saw one picture, Venus in the sea
The sea was painted so real, you could almost hear it roar
It covered Venus to her waist or perhaps a trifle more
My Mother said, 'Come on, Reggie, in case she comes ashore.'
For Mother's so particular with me.


I sat among the buttercups and daisies - don't tell Ma
She'd be afraid they'd bite me being wild
A girl of seventeen came up and seemed to be distressed
She sat by me, I said, 'Come draw it mild.'
She grabbed me by the arm and cried, 'Oh, please, young man don't go
I'll see now what you're made of.' I said, 'Nay, I don't think so,'

Chorus: 'My Mother's so particular with me
But tell me if some service i can be.'
She gazed into my eyes and cried, as to my arm she clung
'I've lost my Auntie, and the bell to close the park has rung.'
I wish you'd chaperone me.' I said, 'Well, I'm rather young.
And Mother's so particular with me.'


We have a 'lady' statue in our hall, a work of art
But acting on the impulse of a fad
Ma's put a lamp-shade round it, now it's like a columbine
She's even burnt the dress stand that she had
And when I'm in the garden Mother makes me turn my head
Because we have some roses and some lillies there in bed.

Chorus:
My Mother's so particular with me
A pantomime she'll never let me see
For Mother disapproves of ladies dressing up in tights
She's had electric lights laid on at home
Because at nights, she says if we had gas there
I should see the naked lights
My Mother's so particular with me.
 
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Written and composed by Frank Leo
Performed by Jack Pleasants (1874-1924)
 
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