THE OLD TROMBONE – A LEGEND
 
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There was an old man play'd on a trombone,
Pow! Pow! Pow! (imitating the Trombone)
The dismalest tune that ever was known
Pow! Pow! Pow!
He was very very old, and very very lame,
But it wasn't for that he was most to blame!
But the tune that he played was always the same,
'Twas Pow! Pow! Pow!

He'd a wife and a very large family
Pow! Pow! Pow!
Who all play'd the very same tune as he,
Pow! Pow! Pow!
And often the family would stand in a row,
And their trombones they would dismally blow,
Till the little dogs all went Oh!
Pow! Pow! Pow!

When the cupboard was empty and the larder quite bare
Pow! Pow! Pow!
This miserable family liv'd upon air,
Pow! Pow! Pow!
In opposite corners they would all sit about,
And they'd blow and they'd blow till they said, no doubt,
When you're hungry there's nothing like a good blow out,
Pow! Pow! Pow!

At last it came to pass one day,
Pow! Pow! Pow!
The family blew itself quite away,
Pow! Pow! Pow!
The old man blew away all his wits,
And the old wife blew herself into fits,
And the rest were blown into little, little bits,
Pow! Pow! Pow!

Moral...
Now young folks think of the miserable fate,
Pow! Pow! Pow!
Of this family ere it be too late,
Pow! Pow! Pow!
The moral's very pretty as far as it goes,
And what I have told you clearly shows,
That families should never, never come to blows
Pow! Pow! Pow!
 
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Written, composed and performed by Richard Corney Grain (1845-1895)
 
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