If my name you vish to know, Je me nomme Pierrot.
Et I come to you perchance, from my country la belle France!
Here dey say so strange you are, my game will be caviare;
But I find dey ouderstand, pantomime in every land,
Ven chez nous ve say "ma belle" to ze girl ve lov' so vell;
Ve jesticulate a lot! ve may mean it, ve may not!
Come viz me to ce qu'on appelle. Ah! I have it. Vite Chapelle,
Coster make lov' vell I'm sure,Voila comme il fait I'amour'.

Pantomimic action.

ARGUMENT. Pierrot Coster whistles to his sweetheart supposed to be at her window. In dumb show he invites her out. She responds by throwing a cabbage at him. He picks it up and laughingly throws it back. She is then supposed to come out and seize his hat. He turns round, sees her and tries to persuade her to return it. In consequence of her refusal, he chases her and is supposed to snatch her bonnet from her. This he will not give up till she kisses him.

Refrain: In pantomime! In pantomime! Dey kiss perhaps dey dream!
'E say, 'good bye' Vat mean dat sigh? 'E ask again, but no reply!
So very meek, she vill not speak. Ze colour deepen on her cheek
'E know quite vell vat all dat mean! Ze pretty blush of seventeen.

Through music, ask, in dumb show, for a kiss, in return for bonnet, then, as if the girl were speaking, say in broad Cockney dialect, 'Kiss? Ga'arn! Git away!'

It is not in lov' alone dat dis pantomime is shown,
Golden silence does so vell, everyvare a look vill tell;
Give a policeman ze tip, not a vord vill pass his lip;
Take the snub of some great dame, nothing said could mean de same!
Two friends who have had a row meet to settle matters now,
Vords dey have no time to vaste, to deir fists dey quickly haste;
Follow me, please, in your mind, vat I say is true you'll find,
Something den like dis you'll see If you'll come along viz me.

Pantomimic Action.

ARGUMENT. The Whitechapel duel up to date. The meeting. Squabble. The first blow. Pierrot Coster willing to forgive. Offers to shake hands. Refused. Angrily pulls his coat off preparatory to pugilistic en counter. A blow temporarily disables him. He revives, strikes out wildly but succumbs to a final blow.

Refrain: In pantomime! In pantomime! His black blue eye vill gleam,
'Is face turn vite. 'E lose de fight but feel convinced 'e's in ze right,
'E does not say, 'You've won ze day.' Ah no! 'E only walk avay
But as 'e go 'e give a parting shot like dis (shake fist) vich means, vell does it not?

Look tack as if threatening revenge, then remembering blow, say in broad Cockney dialect, crying, 'Or right, my boy! Wait till I meet you outside!'

Pantomime in odder vays, stranger still ze part it plays,
Deepest passions may be stirred, not a syllable be heard!
Only ven you look de face, grief et sorrow you can trace;
Vatch de figure if you seek, hearts zat are too full to speak,
Say dat through no fault of his, someone in great trouble is.
Come along ze friend in need, I have seen ze noble deed.
Gladness, terror, fear, surprise, all expressed in tell-tale eyes;
I have heard ze great heart beat. Dis is how dose old- friends meet,

Pantomimic Action.

ARGUMENT. Pierrot meets an old chum in extreme 'poverty. Would like to help him but fears to offend Overcoming this feeling, he determines to offer money, which is gratefully received by his poorer friend.

Refrain: In pantomime! ln pantomime! It seems almost a dream
A friend indeed, ze friend in need whose heart for those in grief can plead,
Ze cloud of fears now disappears, ze poor man's eyes are filled vid tears
'E only look and shake ze hand but vat is meant, dey understand.

Business, handshaking, then spoken in deep earnest, 'God bless you!'

Written and composed by Albert Chevalier & Bond Andrews - 1895
Performed by Albert Chevalier (1861-1923)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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