THE SOCIETY OUTCAST
 
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Just list to my story, believe every word
Though what I shall tell seems a trifle absurd
I'm aware that at present I look far from grand
And yet I have mixed with the best in the land
A few hours ago I was England's first man
And lived like a Lord on Society's plan
Your lords and your ladies my company sought
And yet what a great change a few hours have brought.

Chorus: At twelve o'clock with Lady de Vere
I went trotting my horse round Hyde Park
At one and two I'd a lot to do
Helping Lord Roberts the troops to review
From three to six I spoke in Parliament
All kinds of things I said
At seven I married an heiress
And at eight I fell out of bed.


I dined with King Edward, I dined with the Queen
At all the big banquets I always was seen
I was just on my way to a spread when I woke
To find I was starving, and, worse, I was broke
Oh, cruel are the fates for to play tricks like these
Now, why can't we sleep and wake up when we please?
To stand on a racecourse and see your horse win
And then to wake up before you draw your tin.

Chorus:

My old friend the Marquis, he called upon me
And both of us had such a jolly fine spree
When I think of the money I spent on champagne
It makes me wish that I could dream once again
No more with the King down the Mall will I stroll
The next place I stroll to, will be, up the pole
It's turning my brain for to think that I'm broke
Why, the quids I'd have had if I hadn't woke.

Chorus:
 
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Performed by J.W. Rickaby (1869-1929)
 
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