THEY ALL WENT MARCHING IN
 
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Six old boys went out one day,
And whilst upon their way,
A girl outside a butcher's shop,
Cried, 'Legs are cheap today!'

Chorus: So they all went marching in,
For a couple of legs, no doubt,
But she wouldn't show them what they wanted to see,
So they all came marching out.

Six old boys went further on,
And something they espied,
A card up in a grocer's window,
'Families supplied.'

Chorus: And they all went marching in,
And caused a shock, no doubt,
They ordered a couple of kids apiece,
Then they all came marching out.

Six old boys went arm in arm,
Thought they would make a call,
Ans spend a happy half an hour,
Inside a music hall.

Chorus: So they all went marching in,
To hear some songs, no doubt,
When a girl sang,'Put me in my little bed.'
They all came marching out.

Off they went a rambling,
And they didn't care a sou,
When suddenly they stopped right by,
The doorway of the Zoo.

Chorus: So they all went marching in,
In a cage they heard a shout,
The monkeys swore they were after their jobs,
So they all came marching out.

Soon it started raining,
But they didn't make a fuss,
The six old jolly fellows went,
And hailed a passing bus.

Chorus: And they all went marching in,
Out of the rain, no doubt,
The conductor said, 'Close up Ladies, please,
So they all came marching out.

Six old boys went on their way,
Each full of little tricks,
They passed a hall, a chap was making,
A speech in politics.

Chorus: And they all went marching in,
To hear a speech, no doubt,
But as soon as the speaker there, mentioned 'work',
They all came marching out.

Six old boys felt peckish soon,
And so they made a stop,
They saw a lovely little maid,
Inside a pastry shop.

Chorus: So they all went marching in,
They were hungry without doubt,
They each had a couple of raspberry tarts,
Then they all came marching out.

Six old boys got tired then,
The whole lot in a batch,
Stopped by some gates, where it read,
'Come and see the cricket match.'

Chorus: And they all went marching in,
The batsmen were great, no doubt,
But they hadn't got one like 'Trumper' there,
So they all came marching out.

Whilst walking up the street,
They came across a penny show,
'The fattest girl the world has seen,'
She weighed a ton or so.

Chorus: And they all went marching in,
She was fat without a doubt,
They measured her around the arms,
And they all came marching out.
 
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Written and composed by Chas. Hilbury & Fred Godfrey
Performed by Billy Williams (1877-1915)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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