UNCLE JOE'S SPREE
( Hi Boys )
 
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Uncle Joe's Spree or Hi Boys
[Sung by Vesta Tilley amongst others]

I, from the country came up; there was a little game up;
Uncle Joe wrote down to say, 'Boys, come up, your aunt's away.'
So with my cousins eight, boys, all in a joyful state, boys
Up by train, in style insane, we came to Uncle Joe's.
He gave a loud 'Ha! ha!' and said, 'Now, boys, we'll have a spree,
Aunt's gone away, so we'll be gay on the strict q.t.'
So, with a shout, he led us out, and then exclaimed with glee,
As he placed his finger to his nose, 'Ha, ha, ha'

Chorus: Hi, boys! hi, boys! come with your Uncle Joe
If you want diversion or a nice excursion.
Hi, boys! hi, boys! I'll bet you half-a-crown
In half a tick I do the trick, and show you round the town.

Soon we a cab were hailing, off to the theatre sailing,
Where we saw a ballet gay, which made Uncle shout, 'Hooray'
After the play was over, Uncle, the gay old rover
Went to sup, and champagne cup and S. and B.'s he cleared.
When he came out we walked along, but Uncle seemed to roll,
We tried to hold him up, but 'twas in vain, upon my soul,
All of a sudden he fell through a cellar full of coal,
Shouting to us as he disappeared, 'Ha! ha!, ha!'

Chorus: Hi, boys! hi, boys! come with your Uncle Joe
If you want diversion or a nice excursion.
Hi, boys! hi, boys! I'll bet you half-a-crown
In half a tick I do the trick, and show you round the town.

Up from the coals we grabbed him, but a policeman nabbed him,
Swore he was a burglar bold; said, 'I know your face of old.'
Then, to his consternation, bundled him off to the station,
Where, next morn, in plight forlorn, we found him in the court.
Aunt came and paid his fine, and said, 'You beastly old disgrace!
Out of the house for twelve months hence you shall not show your face.
Wait till I get you home.' And then to us, with sad grimace,
Aunt said, 'Boys, come and see me give him sport, ha, ha, ha.

Chorus: Hi, boys! hi, boys! come with your Uncle Joe
I'll give him diversion, I'll give him excursion.
Hi, boys! hi, boys! I'll bet you half-a-crown
In half a tick I do the trick, and show him round the town.'

 
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Written and composed by E.W. Rogers & Geo. Le Brunn
Performed by Vesta Tilley (1864-1952)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
 
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