ALBERT'S CHRISTMAS PRESENT
by Graffiti Poet The night before Christmas young Albert was anxious and wanted to know, 'Is Santa still coming tomorrow on account of the sleet and the snow?' Mr. Ramsbottom assured him “Of course he is lad, 'ave no fear, he's got transport for all kinds of weather what's powered by eight flying deer.” “Should a thick fog descend in the evening and no matter just how hard it snows, he's another he's able to call on what's famous the most for it's nose.” Dad said “Have you written to Santa to let him know what you want most?”, Albert said “Yes, yes I have Dad, and I gave it to Mother to post." Mother said "Let's leave Santa some Sherry to have with a mince pie or two, plus a saucer of milk for his Reindeer and a Carrot for Rudolf to chew." Alberts fears had been fully abated contented he went to his bed, to wait for St. Nick and his Reindeers and Rudolf who's nose was bright Red. When Albert was finally sleeping Mother turned round and told Dad, “Fetch that stick with the 'orses 'ead 'andle we purchased from Woollies for lad." She said as she wrapped it in paper and finished it nice with a bow, “It's too big to go in his stocking so under the tree it must go.” When Albert woke up in the morning he were eager and anxious to see, if Santa had granted his wishes and left him owt under the tree. Albert leapt out of bed all excited he didn't take long getting dressed, he jumped up and down when he found it shouting “Santa's fetched just what I'd asked.” He charged round the room at a gallop his shouting woke up Mum and Dad, “It's the best thing I've ever been given” both Mother and Father were glad. “It's nice too see Albert so happy” said Mum as she snuggled up warm, "And with a stick with an 'orses 'ed 'andle our Albert should come to no harm.” Little did she know what we know the troubles that present would cause, if she had she would not have let Albert anywhere near Santa Claus.
The end