I'm an undergrad from T.C.D.
Not even an M.D.
Though It's a fellow I ought to be,
A. M, or L.L.D.
Or indeed if you come to that,
Provost of Trinity.
See how the name comes in quite Pat,
Provost Murphy of T.C.D. For

Dialogue: I don't see why I shouldn't be a fellow as well as any other fellow, and if they made me Provust, the Old University wouldn't know itself as sure as:

Chorus: I'm Dick Murphy from T.C.D.
I'm Dick Murphy from T.C.D.
T.C.D. T.C.D.
I'm Dick Murphy from T.C.D.

I'd have a professor of Cricket,
As of divinity,
Who would stand up well for the wicket
Of our old T.C.D.
With Morrison, coach for our eight,
See what the green would do,
Here's an even fiver we'd 'bate'
The light or the dark blue.

Dialogue: Yes, from Putney to Mortlake, we'd walk right away with either Oxonians or Cantabs and show we were no green hands at rowing, while they would look quite blue, fact as,


Others may turn out men of knowledge,
Mere cramming up with pains,
But the boast in our college,
Is we turn out men with brains.
There's Burke, Curran and Tommy Moore,
And Goldsmith in my rhymes,
Of Redan Massy you've heard before,
And Billy Russell of the 'Times'

Dialogue: Tom Moore was a big poet, though he was little, Burke was sublime, Redan Massey showed how our fellows could fight and Billy Russell, 'out special' how they could write, right I am, for...


I've studieds womanosophy,
And want a pretty wife,
Not all ar once, now say who'll be
The partner of my life.
My heart is warm, my brain is clear,
You'll see how tame I'll be,
Find a good husband never fear, in
Dick Murphy of T.C.D.

Dialogue: Yes, our hearts are soft but there's no softness about our heads, they're hard enough, sure as...


Written and composed by Hugh Willoughby Sweny & Alfred Lee
Performed by Vance
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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