(What D'Yer Take Me For, Eh?)

Just because I'm a flimy girl yer takes me for a Jay,
But you bet yer Sunday collar that I'm fly;
And a chap that thinks he's a-goin' to lark about with me,
Stands a chance of gittin' dotted in the eye.
T'other night a bloke as drives and 'orse for Pickford says to me,
'I've got lots of 'oof', so come and have a supper and a spree.'
He says, 'What'll yer 'ave?' 'Why, hoysters, Jim!' says I, but blow my eyes,
When 'e says that whelks are best, yer know! I turns to 'im and cries,

Chorus: 'G'arn away! do you take me for a silly?
G'arn away! do you take me for a jay?
Yer think yer've got me for a mug, well I'm sure,
Strike me up a mulberry, what d'yer take me for, Eh!'

Once a chap walked me out as was considered quite a nob,
Whiskers on his face so werry fierce and black,
Well, 'e kidded me to lend 'im half a dollar, Whitsun week,
And I 'ad to punch 'is 'ead to get it back.
Then 'e got a month in quod and 'e said as how 'e 'ad been ill!
I says, 'Who cut all yer 'air orff? why, you've been upon the mill,
Do yer think I'd have a 'tea-leaf'? You must take me for a fool;
What say? doctor cut yer 'ais orff just to keep yer noodle cool!


Then a swell from the West winked his blinkers once at me,
And in course I tips 'im back a civil wink.
I was eating of some winkles from a paper in my 'and,
Which I offers 'im and then he stands a drink.
Then 'e says, 'If you will fly with me I'll put yer on the stage,
Where yer know the corster business now, is getting quite the rage!'
'What!' says I, 'You teach yer grandmother, my covey, to suck eggs,
D'yer think I'd ever go upon the stage and show my legs?'


Written and composed by E.W. Rogers - 1892
Performed by Marie Lloyd (1870-1922)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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