We all have some sort of trouble in our life,
That seems to worry our lives;
Some are worried if they happen to be wed,
And others if they haven't got wives.
My pal Smith was not worried in this way,
Though his manner was a bit grotesque.
'Til one night a pal invited him to see
An up-to-date burlesque.

Chorus: And be enjoyed it very much,
And his sides with laughter shook,
When the band began to play ta-ra-ra boom-de-ey,
He wore a worried look, he wore a worried look!

Now Billy Brown he was looking for a girl
Who'd make a beautiful wife;
One he wanted with a knowledge how to cook,
Who'd make him very happy through life.
He'd read all of the letters about wives,
In the Telegraph, that could be seen,
He picked out a ladylike and sylphlike girl,
He thought a perfect queen.

Chorus: Then he resolved to marry her,
For she told him she could cook;
When his teeth he gaily thrust within her first pie crust,
He wore a worried look, he wore a worried look!

Now Jones a man is who's musically inclined,
He played the jews-harp and flute;
And he played his banjo all the blessed day,
Until the lodger showed him his boot.
Once he courted a girl who never went out,
So he twanged his banjo in the yard,
But her pa objected to his serenade,
His voice was cracked and hard.

Chorus: Oh, he was full of love and beer,
And the bulldog a fancy took,
When he gave a sudden glance at the back of his pants,
He wore a worried look, he wore a worried look!

Now Tomkins once went to Long Branch for a week,
To loll, to row and to spoon;
Oh, it seemed to him just like a fairy dream,
The time it passed away too soon.
Once at six he went out to have a dip,
At a spot he'd never been before,
And he swam about for nearly half an hour,
Then struck out for the shore.

Chorus: And he went back to find his clothes,
In some lone, secluded nook,
But no clothes of his were there, he'd nothing left to wear,
He wore a worried look, he wore a worried look!
Written and composed by J. B. Dickson & Harry Randall - 1893
Performed by Harry Randall (1857-1932)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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