I am in love, I love a man
I saw him in the looking glass!
I am him and 'him' is me,
So me and him is as you see.
Though we were born together,
We are not exactly twins,
We've got one girl between us
And we share each other's sins.

Chorus: I do love myself, don't I! Don't I love myself!
I'm as kind as kind can be, I'd do anything for me.
Everyone says I'm so good, I'm sure to get on won't I?
I'd always buy a drink for me, I do love myself, don't I!

The other day I met a girl
Whilst strolling Piccadilly way,
I asked her if she'd marry me,
She answered, 'No—but come to tea.'
She lent me half a dollar.
So I strolled around the West;
A lovely ring I bought her-
But it fits me much the best.

Chorus: I do love myself, don't I! Don't I love myself!
Fancy giving her the ring, what a stupid, silly thing.
If on my fingers diamonds blaze I'll look like Rothschild, won't I?
So I will give this ring to me, I do love myself, don’t I!

My kindness it has got no end-
I sometimes feel too good to live;
If I had only got a brown,
I'd change it gladly for a crown.
If I saw someone starving
And I had a-little pelf,
I'd buy a lovely dinner
And I'd share it... with myself.

Chorus: I do love myself. don't I ' Don't I love myself!
I went to a church one day; when the plate it came my way,
As I put in a threepenny bit, I'll go to Heaven, won't. I?
Of course I took out half-a-crown, I do love myself. don't l!

I'll tell you what I did one day,
When I was feeling extra kind;
I went around from door to door,
Collecting money for the poor.
Of quids I soon had twenty,
Then to share them home I flew,
For my honesty, I kept them,
Being the poorest man I knew.

Chorus: I do love myself, don't I! Don't I love myself!
When l saw those quids, egad! I felt. I wanted money bad;
Should I not wish to work again, I'll marry someone, won’t I?
Then she can work to feed my face, I do love myself, don't I!

PDF Sheet Music
Written and composed by T.F. Robson & Percival Langley - 1900
Performed by Will Evans (1872-1931)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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