I often wish that I'd been born upon some other earth
I stole some jam this morning, my Mother never knew
And when I'd ate a pound of it I found that it as glue
Chorus: I was born on a Friday
I was born on a Friday
Never be born on a Friday
It's a most unlucky day
My Father was out
Across the raging foam
And I was born on a Friday
When my Mother wasn't home.
If ever I have lots of food it's only when I dream
When ever they have soup at home they feed me on the steam
Our Mary Ann she had a cold and very bad was she
And just my luck, my Mother put the plaster on to me
Chorus:
I had my 'annual' Yesterday, and oh it made me sneeze
Instead of soap, I'd washed myself with gorgonzola cheese
I had a sweetheart once, and we were going to get wed
But he changed his mind and bought a licence for a dog instead
Chorus:
I went to see the monkeys once, it's true without a doubt
They kept me there for eighteen months before they let me out
I saw a dog in Brighton swim, the owner looked at me
He thought I was a walking stick and threw me in the sea
Chorus:
A fly was on my nose today, a man was passing by
He hit it with a hammer, and he killed that little fly
At home they make me sit before the fire, to have some fun
Then stick a fork into me, just to see if I am done
Chorus:
To have a tooth out once I took our Jane to Doctor Blade
He pulled out two of mine before he found out his mistake
I fell down in the road today, 'twas funny, bless your heart
The dustman with his shovel shovelling me into his cart.
Chorus:
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