Hearken my breathren, Oh hearken, I pray
Always rejoice on this earth while you may
Last night I strolled in the twilight cool
Met a youing girl from our Sunday school
She was a French girl, and at my front door
As french girls do, she kissed me 'Au revoir'.

Chorus: And I said with a pause, 'Ah me, Oui, Oui
You French girls kiss better than English, I see.'
She murmured, 'That's strange, so the Vicar told me,
And I went on my way rejoicing.'

Give what you can to the poor, we are told
I met a beggar one night in the cold
I took my purse out upon the spot
Took out a sovereign, the last I'd got
'If I were to give you this sovereign,' said I
What would you do?' he replied, 'Guv'nor, drop dead.'

Chorus: Then I said with a pause, 'Ah me, what strife
You'd really drop dead?' than I thought of his wife
So I put back the sovereign and saved the man's life
And I went on my way rejoicing.

As an art student, my views are unique
I always take 'Photo Bits' every week
To an Art Gallery last year I hied
A picture of Venus I quickly espied
There in a cornfield she stood with a grin
With corn all around her, right up to her chin.

Chorus: And I said, with a pause, 'Hail, smiing morn.'
Then I called the attendant, and said, with a yawn
'Have you any idea when they're cutting the corn?'
And I went on my way rejoicing.

Written and composed by Worton David & Bert Lee - 1912
Performed by Ernest Shand (1868-1924)
From monologues.co.uk Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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