I am a most unhappy soul
Since I have lost my heart's control
To dashing, mashing, Mister Alex King
Why, I was about eighteen
When twins appeared upon the scene
'Twas but a year I'd worn my wedding ring
I met him in the month of June
'Twas on a windy afternoon
He was a swell to judge him by his clothes
And I had on a Princess gown
A dream that had been handed down
But what attracted him the most was my silk hose.

Chorus: If the wind had only blown the other way
I might have been a single girl today
I'd not be pushing paregoric
Into twins who've got the colic
If the wind had only blown the other way.

He claims that I encouraged him
But that excuse is very thin
I really never knew he followed me
You know how strange a woman feels
When someone's always at your heels
And I was just as scared as I could be
I might have had my skirts all pinned
But how was I to stop the wind
You know quite well how skirts will often fly
Last night I asked him 'Tell me pray
Why did you wink at me that day?'
He said he didn't wink 'twas dust got in his eye.

Written and composed Williams
Performed by Maidie Scott (1887-1966)
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