They says as kiddies follows in the footsteps of their dads
And in all their ways and action they're the same
Well, I must admit I'm father of one of the smartest lads
That's up to every dodge that you can name
'E's a regular imp of mischief with some wonderful ideas
'E's the wrongest 'eaded kid I ever knew
'E's always makin' some-fink out of nuffink wiv 'is brains
It's a marvel 'ow 'e doos it, but 'e do.

Chorus: Well, it's born in 'im, so o' course 'e ain't to blame
When I was a youngster I was just the werry same
It's bred right in 'is bones, there ain't the slightest doubt
And what's born in anyone it must come out.

'E's made a Indian arf-rug wiv 'is muvver's Paisley shawl
And 'e's turned 'er Sunday 'at into a boat
Wiv the skins of two old rabbits that I killed at Christmas time
'E's made isself a ermine overcoat
'E's built a little barf-room, where we used to keep the coals
And 'e's whitewashed all the walls wiv Reckitt's Blue
'E's taught the old tom cat to play ping-pong on the mat
It's a marvel 'ow 'e doos it, but 'e do.


'E's took the front-door knocker off and nailed it on inside
Now you 'ave to come right in before you knock
'E's made the clock go upside down, and when 'e's asked the time
'E stands upon 'is 'ead to see the clock
'E's cut an opening in the roof to ventilate the 'ouse
And to keep the snow or rain from coming froo
'E's made the kitchen colander fit right inside the 'ole
It's a marvel 'ow 'e doos it, but 'e do.

'E stuffs the sink up in the yard and lets the water run
Till 'e makes the place just like a swimming-barf
Then gets inside the wash-tub, and shouts out , 'Ship Ahoy'
And for sails 'e's torn his muvver's sheets in 'arf
Our beautiful canary, that I bought for half-a-crown
'E let it out to see if it could fly
'E tried to put the fire out with a quart of paraffin
Then laid the butter on the 'ob to dry.


Written and composed by Chas. Cornell & Maurice Scott
Performed by Gus Elen (1862-1940)
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