A masher once so late at night a tearful maiden spied
Who stood in terror on the curb. He asked her why she cried
Said she, 'I've lost the last bus home. It's quite six miles they say
I have no cash to pay a cab and, oh, I've lost my way'
'Come dry your eyes, my pretty bird' the masher bold replied
I've heaps of coin and homeward in a cab with you I'll ride.

Chorus: Lost her way, poor girl, lost her way, poor girl
She cried and made a fuss, lost her train and lost her bus
And lost her way poor girl, lost her way poor girl
She had to get a 'jay' to help her find it.

They drove till in a country lane. The maid said, 'We'll get down'
The masher paid the cab man, who drove back to London Town
When quite alone the maiden turned and then in manly strains
Said, as a pistol she displayed, 'Your money or your brains'
'Brass up, no humbug, I'm no girl, but Bill the burglar bold'
The masher paid out all his quids and madly murmured 'Sold'


'Yet stay' the masher cried, 'That coin's my master's, not my own
So fire some bullets through my clothes to prove that pluck I've shown'
Six bullets then the robber fired, 'I've no more left' said he
Then, whipping a revolver out the masher cried with glee
'Hand back my cash, and yours, or else out goes your evil brain'
And as he took the robber's 'oof' he chanted this refrain.

Performed by 'Viscount' Walter Munroe (d. 1914)
home spaceA spaceB spaceC spaceD spaceE spaceF spaceG spaceH spaceI spaceJ spaceK spaceL spaceM spaceN spaceO spaceP spaceQ spaceR spaceS spaceT spaceU spaceV spaceW spaceX spaceY spaceZ