Oh! London's a wonderful kind of a city,
A mixture of Bishops and Barthelmy fair;
If you never have been there, I say more's the pity,
It would make you keep up a perpetual stare.
There nothing but fuss is, all cabs, vans and buses,
There's all that the universe ever can show;
And amongst it's delights and the best of it's sights,
You'll find are the waxworks of Madame Tussaud's.

Chorus: Madame Tussauds, Madame Tussauds,
You'll find are the waxworks of Madame Tussauds,
And amongst it's delights and the best of it's sights,
You'll find are the waxworks of Madame Tussaud's.

There are all sorts of figures, from monarchs to N*****s,
There is Edward the First taking snuff with John Knox;
There's Cromwell just arter he signed Magna Charta,
And Tom Thumb and Chaucer at billiards with Fox.
There's Old Penn the Quaker, consulting Greenacre,
There's Cobbett advising Queen Anne to rebel;
There's the Duke they call Iron, King Charles and Lord Byron,
And Shakespeare reciting a play to Parnell.


There's Wolsey who's robed in a suit made for Cobden,
There's William the Conqueror singing to Peel;
There's Luther who's planning to wed Mrs. Manning,
And Burns and King Theodore dancing a reel.
There's Garrick reliant on Loushskin, the Giant,
There's Bradlaugh who's flirting with Lady Jane Grey,
While Nelson and Odger are chaffing Sir Roger,
'Cos' he took Joan of Arc and Queen Bess to the play.


Madame Tussaud's was popular with the Victorians as it provided them with a focal point for their fascination with the monarchy. Figures such as Queen Victoria were popular. It also provided a historical context, with figures of Napoleon, a history of the wars, as well as a gruesome chamber of horrors providing entertainment for those visiting.

Written and composed by Robert Reece & Arthur Lloyd - 1881
Performed by J.L. Toole (1830-1906)
From Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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