We sailed away, a week today,
(Or it may be a week or two more)
We piped all hands on the main jibboom,
And steered for a foreign shore.
We came to the top of a great steep hill,
In a voice that made the earth shake,
The captain roared, 'Throw the deck overboard,
For we've cannoned against an earthquake.

Chorus: Oh, we hoist our slacks,
And as the ship (tin) tacks,
We jerk her and shove into motion,
We heave to, you see,
If we can't heave three,
Oh, we do have a time on the ocean.

It began to blow, so we yelled, 'Heave ho!'
(That's German for 'pull up your trousers');
And the ship pushed on in its usual way,
Knocking down rocks and lighthouses.
We heard a cry from a pub close by,
Which caused us a little delay,
For we'd lost the spring of the larboard watch,
So we couldn't tell night from day.

(Sailors Hornpipe play-off)
Written, composed and performed by Tom Woottwell (1865-1941)
From Music Hall Lyrics Collection
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