(Reply to 'At Trinity Church I Met My Doom')
You've heard that party tell you how he met his doom at church
Well, I'm his wife, he's spent my cash, and left me in the lurch
You've heard the lies he's told you and at me you've heard him rail
But you must please remember there are two sides to a tale.
And now I'll give you my account - 'twill cause you some surprise
To know that he's a drunkard who would black his poor wife's eyes
He's got a hump and wooden leg - lor what was up with me
To go and marry 'arf a man and 'arf a blooming tree.

Chorus: For he'd come home at night when twelve was striking
Stick in a pub all day a-milking
Mopping up pints of four-ale till the beauty couldn't see
If you meet him you're sure to know
Who he is for he walks like so
He's broken the bank and broke the home up
That's what he's done for me.

I'm sorry to admit it, but 'e really ain't no class
He only married me because I'd got a bit of brass
He thought I'd got some hundreds, but I'd only thirty quid
And when he found it out he used some language, that he did
He didn't do a stroke of work from that eventful day
He'd only mooch around the pub and try to find a 'jay'
He'd often tell me he was a brass finisher by trade
And so he was - he's finished up the little bit I made.


He sticks in pubs all day long, he's always on the lap
And though he is a cripple, straight, I tell you he can scrap
I'd no idea that he had ever contemplated crime
But now I've heard from neighbours that he's done no end of 'time'
That's just the way he goes on since he's done my ooftish in
Black eyes and broken nose is my portion - what a sin
Each stick of furniture is gone of our once lovely home
And now the only furniture we've got's a small tooth-comb.

Performed by Vesta Victoria (1874-1951)
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